I love the concept of the home as the laboratory for learning to love and to live gospel principles. Here is a quote from Elder Nelson regarding this idea:
Where the home is, there love should be. The home is the laboratory of love, and in it resides the most important unit of the Church and of society—the family. Recently I was interviewed by a representative of a national magazine who expressed keen interest in a photograph on my desk of Sister Nelson and me with our family. He asked if we had any problems with rebellious youth, drug abuse, and morals among such a large family. When I replied in the negative, his interest seemed to become more intense.
Then he said, “When did you and your wife start to plan for your family and give them such emphasis in your lives?”
I simply replied, “Before we were ever married.” Then I continued, “You see, we believe that our major goal in life is to strengthen our family. Service in the Church, the community, continuing education, and our occupational endeavors all are undertaken to provide development for our family.”
He seemed surprised. He countered; “But earlier in our interview you said you and your wife had always tried to obey the scripture, ‘Seek ye first the kingdom of God.’ Now you tell me the family comes first.”
He thought he had me. But I simply reviewed my long-established priorities and said, “I cannot seek the kingdom of God without loving and honoring first that family he has given to me. I cannot honor that family without loving and caring first for my wife!” I love her. She is my highest priority, and our eternal marriage in the temple is our highest commitment. We love our children and their children born and yet unborn. This love we are building in the sanctuary of our home. Here is where we have learned the power of love, and I testify that it is a real, dynamic, all-encompassing power!
-Elder Russell M. Nelson, Ensign, March 1979
I think our relationships in the home really are the true test of our character. The family is where we see each other at our best and at our worst. At home is where we tend to let down our guard and where our true self is revealed. Within the home is where we have the greatest opportunity to serve- to truly give of ourselves and to learn to be selfless. With our family members we have the greatest opportunity to exercise virtues such as patience, forgiveness, gratitude, and unconditional love.
Certainly we should not expect perfection from father, mother, sister, or brother, but I believe a wise Heavenly Father designed families as a means of developing godlike attributes. Truly “the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.”

5 comments
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October 4, 2008 at 11:51 am
Aileen
Home can sometimes be the hardest place. Expectations are higher, as they should be. It’s easier to see/feel your own imperfections, and likewise, perhaps easier to see imperfections in others. Unfortunately. Home can be very hard work indeed.
October 4, 2008 at 10:09 pm
Jim
Aileen, I agree with you that being a spouse and a parent can be the hardest work that we do. As you mention, we see our own imperfections, and this gives us the opportunity to be humble and to seek to do better. We see the imperfections in others, and this gives us the opportunity to love and to forgive in spite of their weaknesses and to realize that none of us is perfect.
Hopefully the fact that it is hard work is a sign that we are on the right path- that we care and are trying.
I read this article earlier today that discusses parenting and thought that you might like it.
Thanks for visiting my little blog and for leaving a comment!
October 5, 2008 at 9:13 pm
jo
jim,
i LOVE that quote by elder nelson. isn’t he amazing? i think his point about seeking first the kingdom of God and putting family first was really true.
as for me, i think you know my family life (since getting married) has had a lot of highs and lows. we have had a lot of very difficult struggles to get through from a very early point in our marriage and that has led to some good habits and some bad habits. but i do know that when things aren’t going well at home my whole world seems bleak, and when we are all getting along, cheerful, helping out, and trying to make each others’ lives better, there is not a happier place.
i need to constantly remind myself that there is nothing more important than how i treat my husband and children, and making sure our home is centered in the gospel of Jesus Christ.
you’re such a good example to me! thanks, bro!
October 6, 2008 at 9:12 am
Ray
Jim. I always just end up linking to posts from my blog. I apologize for that to some degree, but here I go again. (*grin*)
http://thingsofmysoul.blogspot.com/2008/08/anger-without-cause-dealing-with.html
October 6, 2008 at 9:30 am
Jim
Jo, thanks for your comment- it reminds me of the hymn, “There is beauty all around, when there’s love at home.” It is true- when we all get along well and seem to care for each other- everyone is happy and home is heaven on earth. I suppose that as imperfect people we will not reach that ideal 100% of the time, but I know for us that we can do better. I think it is one of those things where just a little extra effort, if we can muster it, can yield big results. And maybe that’s the catch- on our own, maybe there are times where we just can’t muster another ounce of strength, and that is when we need to rely on the Lord’s strength. Just a thought….
Ray- thanks for the link- I will have a look. I appreciate your insights.